Full Careers
How do I deal with an early mid-life crisis?
I have had a decent career as a Manager at an Ad Agency or printing company. I’m divorce and I have a 4 yr old daughter. I live in CT, but I’m dating a woman that lives in MA. I’m on the verge of moving to MA with her. In some ways this is good; I get to start my life over. But I feel like things could fall part if I don’t have a plan. My concern is the stress in my life. Lots of changes are stressful as is my job. It pays well, but I know its affecting my health. I’m looking forward to a change. If I can find a way to support myself in Massachusetts, I would be happier. But, I’d really like to do something else, but dread having to go back to school and take a pay cut to re-establish myself in some other career. Ideally I’d like to have a business of my own, but what is that? Any advice on how I can find some stability on my life and be content would be appreciated. I have this great opportunity to start over; I just don’t want to stumble around in life blindly. No religious answers please I certainly live up to my responsibilities as a dad and my daughter is my first priority. I love her and she loves me. But, I only get to see her every other weekend. You have no idea how hard that is on me. I would be living about an hour and fifteen minutes from her, so no big deal. I think I will be an even better dad if I get my own life in check.
Public Comments
- Sounds like you're thinking of yourself more than your daughter. Wait 12 years before you crash. Be a decent parent.
- Try teaching....it make take a little bit, (which by the sounds you don't want to really do..) but it can be rewarding. Or apply to be a fireman, policeman, paramedic (more schooling but...) those are also rewarding....
- You are well on your way my friend. You seem like a smart guy, does being with your girlfriend give you the satisfaction and completion you are looking for or is it just avoiding being alone? How far would you be from your Daughter and how often do you want to see her? Most guys will buy a boat, a sports car, go running around and chasing skirt as much as possible and that's fine, but at some point you have to come back to reality and figure out what you want for yourself.
- I know what you are talking about... I sometimes wish I could do the same.. But I don't because of my child...I want to be here for him....I remember my folks weren't around to raise me they were always off working... I just want to be here because my folks weren't I want to see if it does make a difference...The hard part is to think of him before my own self ( in some aspects ) I myself am unhappy in ways and want to go and not worry but Deep down it would hurt to much to be away from him... I truly think you just need a good house keeper who cooks and when you want have a companion....JUST Make sure the child is out of the house....Or have a baby sitter and go someplace else for the companionship... Your child at that age Needs to feel they have your full attention if you want them to talk to you later... My boy is 7 now and he talks to me about everything and I do mean everything a 7year old can think of or ask...It has ben worth being here at times I didn't want to .. ( I did get some meds to help with the feeling ) cause I know if I wasn't hear then he wouldn't be this pearson he is now.. and he is growing up to be a good strong and stable boy So I am seeing that staying in one spot is helping him.... The trick is to keep up the same pace for him....... To Much ??? I apologies if so.... Good Luck in your Choice...
- Well, be proactive and start looking for a job in MA before you make the actual plans to go. The cost of living isn't that different, and you will be sharing expenses, so that helps. Personally, I have started over as you are right now, but alone, so it is great that you are gratful for the support that you have in your girlfriend. I too took a pay cut and walked away from a stressful job that had me working all kinds of crazy hours and it took me 4 years to come back - ALONE, but I am back. I would say you need to follow your heart and look for something that will pay the bills, give you enough extra to splurge on yourself and your girls (GF & daughter) and give you peace of mind. They are out there, trust me. As far as a mid-life crisis, darlin' you aren't out there boffing every young thing and not taking care of your respnsibilities, so this isn't what this is, it is just a turning point in your life. Good luck, and remember, it is all about enjoying the journey, not how much is accumulated along the way.
